Some people may think it’s old fashioned to ask for the parents’ blessing for their daughter’s hand in marriage, but I wanted to know that Crystal’s parents wanted me to be a part of their family. So I made plans to stop by their house before I went to Crystal’s on the weekend before Christmas. I asked Crystal to make some dinner as I would be busy with homework when I got there and I figured this would be the best way to keep her at her house. Being the sweet girl that she is, she agreed to fix lasagna and a salad for me!
I made the 3 hour drive from Pigeon Forge to Cartersville and tried to come up with the words to tell her parents how much I loved their daughter and how to ask for their blessing. I pulled up to their house with no more words than I left my house with and decided to wing it. I think I was more nervous about this than I am the actual proposal!!!
I carried what her parents believed were just ordinary Christmas gifts for Crystal inside with me and they asked to see what I got her. I told them that I had a few things I wanted to say first. It went something like this:
“I’ve put a lot of thought and prayers into this so go easy on me as this is my first time doing this…and hopefully my last. Crystal and I have been seeing each other since March. During that time, she has brought a lot of joy and inspiration into my life. She’s an incredible girl with an incredible family. You all have treated me like your own and there is no doubt in my mind that Crystal will make an excellent wife and mother and that you all will make great in-laws. With your blessing, I’d love to ask Crystal to marry me.”
There was a pause that seemed to last forever and I felt my heart drop. Her mom had tears in her eyes with a big smile and said, “You’re going to make me cry!” Her dad on the other hand…stoic…no expression. I thought, “Uh oh.”
Finally he said, “I have two things I want to say.” Here I am thinking “oh crap.” He goes on to say, “She’s my only girl and I want her protected and safe…always. I never want a finger laid on her. You seem like a decent guy and I know you’ll make her happy…she’s crazy about you and I think you’re crazy about her. The other thing is…I appreciate you doing this. Some people think it’s old fashioned to ask for the parents’ blessing, but you were sincere about it and I appreciate that.”
Whew.
He went on to ask about my plans…whether I will move and what I will do if I move. I told him about how well Crystal has done with her life with her career, house, car, etc and that I would hate to take her away from such a great family. I said, “I may not be able to give her everything she wants, but I’ll give her everything that I’ve got.”
Shortly after that, he stood up, shook my hand, hugged me and said, “Welcome to the family. I know you’ll make a great son-in-law and we’re going to have a lot of fun.” Mama jumped up and hugged me and I felt a HUGE sigh of relief wash over me…the hard part was done!!!
After that, I showed them my plans for the proposal, which they loved and agreed to help with! Everything is ready to go now!!!
Daddy Alred says
Shane,
Thanks for including Mama Alred & I in your plans for Crystals big day December 24, 2005. Maybe someday you will experience the same joy that we did. I think the only way to discribe it is WOW. I Would like to wish you and Crystal only the best. Mama & I will always be in yall’s corner